38. Giants

Just so you know, I’m a nervous wreck these past few weeks and I may or may not have mentioned that already.

I don’t really have a way to express the thoughts that are going on in my head this week, except to say that, as I’m further preparing to launch this podcast in less than two weeks (OH. MY. GOODNESS!!!), I’m so at peace unlike I’ve ever been before about whether or not I’m doing the right thing. I haven’t read the book yet, but have heard many of the sermons from a local Atlanta pastor that we really enjoy following, Louie Giglio, whose book “Goliath Must Fall,” talks about taking down the giants in our lives, like fear, anger, greed, and so on.

Normally, these giants would be pounding me into a pulp right now and my stress and anxiety would be through the roof. I’d be losing so much sleep, distracted and unmotivated, you name it. My perfectionist tendencies would be fired up right now, trying to make sure everything was just how I wanted it to be, and if it wasn’t, then I couldn’t possibly go through with my plan.

But, here’s the thing: For some strange, divine reason, I have that peace I mentioned before and it has overtaken my mind, body and spirit. I’m still nervous,… anxious,… impatient. But it feels so contained, like God is telling me that it’s okay to feel this way, but if you keep your eyes on me, I’ll keep your giants at bay.

I still haven’t finalized the cover for my podcast, nor have I started recording. That’s where the anxiety and fear of failure is coming from. I have all the ideas, the process, the system, everything figured out. It’s just simply a matter of starting, doing, getting out of my comfort zone.

To date, this is the biggest leap of faith/response to God’s calling that I’ve ever taken in my life and there’s a lot of frazzled nerves in me as I begin taking those first steps into this new, uncharted territory. There will be unprecedented amounts of honesty and transparency, as well as a lot of silliness, confusion, and nonsense that you’ll hear in this podcast, but it’s all the real me. Conversations are going to be had that people tend to believe are “better left alone…” Awkward topics, uncomfortable questions, and real life issues that would otherwise never see the light of day.

Over the next few days, if you have a chance to read “Goliath Must Fall” by Louie Giglio or watch all of the messages on Passion City Church’s website, I believe you’ll walk away encouraged and equipped to face your giants. Until next week, I hope you find a way to begin tackling some of your giants and start to break free from the things that are holding you back!

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